Should We Enjoy the Vampire Bite?

October 31^st.  It’s just around the corner.  Before long we’ll see kids in white bed sheets carrying orange pumpkin pails filled with candy going from house to house, as well as the teenagers dressed in more grotesque outfits like scream and zombie masks.  We may also see the occasional light-hearted costume like the geeky girl dressed up as Princess Leia or the countless Darth Vader costumes that invade sci-fi costume parties.  But Halloween reminds me of more than trick-or-treating and costume parties.  It reminds me of the folklore that has exploded into a sub-culture of horror-fantasy, and with it one of the most successful of all fantasy creatures: the vampire.  And with that comes the grim reminder that the last dreadful episode of the Twilight Saga hits theaters November 16^th, just a couple short weeks after Halloween.  It’s enough to make me cringe.

            Okay, so some of you are mad at me right now.  That’s fine, I can live with that.  But before you start calling me a heartless, prejudiced, and grumpy cynic, hear me out.  I’ve read the books, and I’ve seen the movies (and yes, I realize that may place my man-card in jeopardy).  So I am not one of the guys who is loudly hacking to pieces something that he knows nothing about.  But you see, there’s something very specific about all of the propaganda that disturbs me to the core. 

            Unlike a lot of guys, I love a good love story.  I could very easily be accused of liking some “chick flicks” here and there.  I also love fantasy.  I even write some fantasy myself.  The problem is, we’ve not seen the Twilight Saga for what it truly is.  When you tear away the fluff and squint your eyes to see past the fog, what you find is not love and definitely isn’t fantasy…at least not any fantasy I would have.

            Let’s take a step back.  Look at the horrifically infamous statement from Bella in the first book: “About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was part of him — and I didn't know how potent that part might be — that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.”  First of all this statement even on its own merit sounds so pathetic that I think even Ghandi would feel the need to ferociously smack Bella, but that’s not the point.  The point is what she said in the last sentence: “I was unconditionally—“ Ok, I can live with that—“and irrevocably in love with him.”  Whoa, hold the phone, sister!  Irrevocably?!  So, she’s in love with a guy who just might want to rip her heart out and suck all of her blood.  Believe it or not, I can live with that (let’s not forget that Adolph Hitler was married, after all.  Some women can be pretty dense), but the fact that she believes in cannot be changed.  This is love. Unconditional and unchangeable.  Now in and of itself I don’t have a problem with that message.  My parents love me unconditionally.  They’ve gotten pretty mad at me at points, but they never stopped loving me.  But here’s the kicker: at this point in the story, Bella knows absolutely nothing about Edward.  Why does she love him?  At the end of the day, she doesn’t really know.  Here’s the thing that is so dangerous about the Twilight Saga and most every other love story that has become popular in the last decade: it presents love as out of your control.  You can’t control who you fall in love with and you don’t understand why you love them, you just know you do and you have to be around them.  Sounds suspiciously like a drug addiction to me.  When we reduce love this far, bad things will happen.

            One out of every two marriages in this country end in divorce.  People continue to speculate and give different reasons for this, but I don’t think there’s much of a question to it.  It’s because we look at love like an uncontrollable state of mind, just like a drug addiction.  And when we can’t get the same high, we go to another drug, another person.  Don’t do that to yourself or to the ones in your life.  Think about what your buying into.  As for me, I think I can afford to sit out the conclusion of the cultural monstrosity.  What will you buy into?